She Loves Magazine’s theme this month is home…and it has had me thinking…


This morning, on a whim, I rang AJ and asked him if he was free for lunch.

I was in the city with the girls, I knew he was busy, but did he have time? Yep, let’s do it.

We met at one of our pre-kid haunts. Bare brick walls covered in retro mirrors, Moroccan lamps and good vegetarian food; it expanded and receded with our nostalgia.

It was busy and loud, and we added our 5-strong noise to the din.

Between the cries for cuddles, a broken shoe (yep, a broken shoe) and a table brimming with food I glanced over at AJ. We were sitting side by side. Something we don’t often do. He is usually down one end of the dinner table in high pressure negotiations with a savvy 2 year old, me down the other fielding questions on school yard protocol.

I glanced at AJ.  Momentarily captured by his goodness and kindness.


He leant over and kissed me, smiled and turned back to his task of convincing Isla to eat more than corn chips.


This is home.


My sister has been on holidays and she wasn’t expecting to have internet access while she was away. I was delighted to see an email from her earlier this week. Two lines crammed with shared history, jokes that only we would understand and my nick name that only she uses.

Uncontainable, uncontrolled, unfettered laughter burst out of me.

The rest of the day was tinged with the joy of sisterhood and the glittering happiness of being known and loved.

This is home.


The house is quiet. The girls have been in bed for hours now, AJ too.

Josh Rouse plays quietly, the wine is red and warming, and I am attempting to read Margaret Atwood (again), but she will soon be put to the side for Thomas Merton.

This is home.

Not this house. This quiet.

This quiet moment of stillness and of recognition. I am content in these moments of quiet and solitude. They are my refuge and my sustenance.

This is home.